Itsy Bitsy Spider...

Rhea singing Itsy Bitsy spider! You have to be a complete idiot to not think this is not the cutest thing EVER!!! This is what I DO!..... I breed SUPERSTARS!

Daddy and Raven's Handshake...

Daddy has a serious bond with his girls. He teaches them everything! Here is something that he taught Raven a couple years ago and she still hasn't forgot it. Check out the Kool-Aid smile she gives the camera at the end! Loves it!

Breaking News...

The weapons of mass destruction that George Bush has been looking for all these years have finally been found. Turns out they were in Rhea’s diaper all this time. (Exhibit A attached below.) I seriously hope the government doesn’t come after me because I’ve been harboring a terrorist. I wonder… if they will give me a finders fee. If they do, and they need to take Rhea to do some investigating on her, I might give them a BOGO deal..... and let them take Raven too …. for the right price of course.

OK. OK. I kid. I kid. It’s a joke people! Don’t try to report me to the Dept. of Children of Families. If you do, we’ll be on the first flight outta Georgia and be hanging out in somebodies hut in East Africa… so don’t waste your time.

In all seriousness, I just don’t understand how an adorable two year old, who eats balanced meals can smell like a 60 year old man. It just doesn’t add up! She’s two and I’m STILL not used to it. Every time I change her, I can feel my lil nose hairs burning up like I’m sniffing on a lighter. And then… I can feel my breathing slow down as if my lungs are giving up on me. Something is not right about this. I have been changing diapers for a long time. I know what’s normal and what’s not. And what’s coming out of that lil body… IS NOT.

Why does this bother me?

I'm driving to work... and what do I see? A white man in a pick up truck... in Georgia...with a damn confederate flag...waving all over the damn place! The flag is so big it seems like the red neck is trying to say "Yeah! Ya god darn right I got this big ol flag waving tall and proud! I'm a rebel!"   ....Something about it bothered me. What bothered me more is that I was actually bothered by it.

 This dude has his rights! He can paint his whole damn car the colors of the confederate flag right?  He can have a front plate that says Lynchville and a back plate number that reads NI993R  .....Why should I care?!?!? .... I'm not exactly sure...I just know that I do.   BUT...I bet ya $2 that Billy Ray wouldn't go anywhere NEAR Atlanta with that damn thing on his car! It's cause we live in the sticks he feels he can be bold!

If I see him on the road again, I'll be sure to stare him down and when we make eye contact, I'll stick my tongue out and accelerate really fast and haul ass outta there! I'm bold. Not dumb. .....AND I have seen that movie "A Time to Kill". Billy Ray ain't throwing ME over no bridge!

It's the little things...

When I'm stressing about everything... everything that's really nothing at all...God has a strange way of bringing me back to reality. It's at the most random times that my kids always seem to bring me back to where I need to be...without saying a word.
                             
   Here is one of those times...

Working out?!?!

I have gotten a lot of advice over the years about how I can get fit. I think I might have a slight form of ADHD because I’m not the type of person that can stick to something boring or to ANYTHING for too long. I know people who jog… walk… ride their bike…ride the exercise bike…. Walk the treadmill… go hiking…yoga… Pilates…aerobics and a million other things… I’m trying to figure out something I can do that I will actually enjoy….that will actually motivate me to want to go out there and sweat.


I’ve walked around my neighborhood….Boring. Treadmill… boring….Stairmaster…too much work…yoga…I can’t bust those moves those white ladies do (not that flexible)…. Pilates (one time)…. Came home and threw up. The only thing I haven’t tried is bike riding. I was thinking about getting a bike and riding around my neighborhood but I fear that if I buy one and then don’t use it, my husband, as supportive as he is, will give me the “You bought something else you didn’t use?” look. He won’t say anything about it… but I know he will be thinking it. I know… I can only imagine what he was thinking about all the $$$ spent on the Mary Kay products that are sitting in bedroom…short lived dreams of me cruising in a pink Cadillac.

Anyway, I’m curious about how the majority of people get their sweat on. Maybe I will go with the majority. So…… how do YOU work out?

Don't Judge me...

So my last posting was about my mommy tummy. I got a lot of feedback about that. So many people talking about "Heaven, you should do this... do that.... go jogging... take the kids to the park... wake up early and run... put the kids to sleep and work out to a DVD.....whah.... blah.. blah... whah...." I was overwhelmed. I was thinking... Man that is so much easier said then done. YES! And I know it sounds like excuses I'm making for not working out, but I'd like to call them good explanations with frosting on top... and sprinkles....with fudge drizzled on it.... Damn I sound fat as hell... ANYWAY.. what I'm saying is that I have a really good excuse to not work out. TIME! I know what you're thinking! You have to make time. I once had a friend lose 90 pounds and she told me she made time to work out. She made it fit in the day and it was a must to get it done. She treated it just as important as picking her son up from day care every evening..... Well thats great and everything but I don't think I'm fat enough to have that kind of ambition. Still sounds like excuses huh... I KNOW I KNOW damn it! I just want it to be easy! Why can't I just look like this...

This amazing bitch had 3 kids in like 2 months and looks like this now! And her youngest is like 5 months! Don't you just hate hoes like this! Ok... I'm kidding... she's a pal of mine. But seriously, how does this broad have 3 kids that are all 2yrs and under and wear this dress?!?! Maybe I should I ask her how she does it as opposed to stealing her pic off facebook and posting it on my blog without her permission. Yeah...whatever.

Anyhow, I DID attempt to get up yesterday morning and this morning and work out. 45 minutes yesterday and 30 minutes today. I just walked to this walking DVD the hubby got me from Sam's Club. Yesterday I got a lil sweat in and I was feeling good.... but then.... I had to go to work and be in by noon and didn't get to eat breakfast OR lunch so I had to pick up something on the way to work and then I had to eat lunch at work..... but because I have about 20 minutes to get the lunch and then 46 seconds to eat the lunch at my desk, I had to go with what was fast, cheap and easy.

                       So.... here are my meals for yesterday. Once again...Don't judge me!

Zaxby's for breakfast/lunch on the way to work...of course with a soda to wash it all down. Ya know Zaxby's can be salty! I needed the soda!

And some Subway at my desk for lunch... and YES...that is a 32oz soda.... for the last time. Don't judge me!

Oh and just in case you were wondering, dinner was about 4 bites of the sub that I left behind from lunch. All in a days work...