Street Vernacular

Me and the hubby had a nice evening planned. The nice evening consisted of us eating ice cream in the bed after putting the kids to sleep… and then getting some “man/wife” time….. Which eventually would lead to going to bed by a decent hour so neither one of us would wake up cranky in the morning. And yes, when you’re married with kids, you have to schedule your frisky hour… There is no spontaneity involved; unless you want your kids to catch you with your ass in the air of course… Anyhow, frisky hour (30 minutes MAX for me), was planned out and we were in the bed. I had the laptop in the bed with me and I was checking some emails that were too large to open up earlier on my Blackberry. My friend sent me a YouTube video that me and hubby watched together. After watching this video together, there was no need for frisky hour. After replaying this video several times and laughing ourselves to sleep, we had all the satisfaction we needed for one night. But trust me, I didn’t get off that easy…he made me late for work in the morning…

Here is the video…


Watching this video made me happy and ashamed to be black all at the same time. Black people can be so entertaining and colorful, but yet so inappropriate and disappointing!

At the 40 second mark, the young lady was so matter of fact about her attack… She seemed like she was more annoyed that she had broken glass on her floor than the fact that she almost got raped. She says, “I was attacked by some IDIOT, from out here in the projects!” Well dayum… She said that like it’s an every Thursday night occurrence that some stranger comes through the window and rubs on her booty while she is asleep! But then again, SHE IS… in the projects, so perhaps she’s just grateful that her ear wasn’t grazed by a stray bullet from the drive by the night before… could be… could be not… just a theory.

But what really had my stomach hurting was the SheMan brother who saved the day! He has to be the funniest thing that has ever been posted on Youtube… hands down.

At 59 seconds he says, “Hide ya kids, hide ya wife, AND hide ya husband… cause they rapin errrrrbody out here!” Do you see how black people just be exaggerating??! Whose husband got raped?? What is he talking about? Why does he have to be so extra??

He continues by saying, “You done left finger prints and all!!!! You are so dumb!”… Notice he was stomping his right foot and had his head cocked to the side as he was saying that (replay it and see at 1:22)… and he needed to do all that for emphasis of course. He needed errrybody to know how dumb the rapist is…

And I LOVE the part where he says…

“We GONE find you… I’mma let you know Nah! So you can go and runtellDAT!..... HOMEBOY!”... All that was missing from this video was for him to end it off with a high pitched… “Biyeetch!”

Why can’t black people act right in front of the camera?? Don’t they know that the whites are looking at them and shaking their heads thinking…“We should have left their asses in Africa!”

I understand that if you are ghetto and project you are simply ghetto and project! But if I know how to get right and speak properly in front of people from a different persuasion, I don’t see why this man who looks like a cross between a rat and crack head can’t either… I’m just saying… I’m not saying that you have to front for people and be someone who you aren’t, but I do think that you should be able to adapt to your surroundings and behave accordingly…. Should you not? And THIS is why people from all races, including black people always say, “Now you know black folks don’t know how to act!”

Dave Chapelle said it best when he was being interviewed on some show (can’t remember the show) but he said, “There is a difference between speaking Job Interview and Street Vernacular.” It’s safe to say that buddy in the video is NOT bilingual!

Now RuntellDAT!... Biyeetch!!!

Oh and one final thing… AS IF, this damn video wasn’t already funny enough, someone with some time on their hands made a remix!! I love it!